First of let's start by saying he never technically became a teenage girl. If that disappoints you I'm sorry. If he had become one overnight I probably would have been on the Today Show and would be writing a book about it because that's what you do.
Also I should mention that this is another in my VapoDad series. These posts are about taking care of someone when they're sick... And it's a two parter in one post. The first part being long and rambling and the second one being short.
Part one:
So waiting for MF to get sick didn't take long because he was sick about a two weeks ago. Just pink eye in both eyes, bronchitis (which I totally spelled correctly without spell check but you'll have to take my word on that) and a slight ear infection. This of course meant I was sick last week but only for a bit.
And you're asking how he became a teenage girl... Well I'll tell you and then you'll get pissed that I'm saying he was a teenage girl instead of teenage boy but you can slam me if you'd like. Also please do it on your blog and link to mine so I get some extra traffic... An early thank you.
With all the things wrong with him he was given Prednisone, I thought it was called Pregnisone for a long time... Anyway there is a family history with Prednisone. Fifty-percent of the pre-kid household had been on it before (not me) and when this person fully Prednisoned and was on the phone with her mom she may have been yelling. And then when called out on it she may have yelled "I am not yelling." Also I might need a couch to sleep on tomorrow.
What I'm saying is, hypothetically, it might make otherwise sane people go a little coo coo if that's how you spell it (doesn't look right).
And so there was little MF on steroids... Totally roiding out... And that's when the teenage girl attitude came out (really I mean that strong independent thing that I think teen girls do with a better air to it than teen boys do... seriously).
All of a sudden he was ordering us around... And at first we let him because he's sick... Then we realized he's a teenager.
We'd hold him and he'd say "go right there" and point to where he wanted to go... I guess this wouldn't be so odd but he never said it before. So it was "go right there." "Go right there." "Go right there."
And there really was no right there. Also he forgot words like kitchen, upstairs and bedroom. Everything was a vague "right there."
Also he learned the word because... And he used it with a teen girl attitude...
"Why are you on the table?"
"Because."
"Why are you spilling all the dog's water?"
"Because"
"Why are you screaming?"
In a totally calm voice: "because."
And then the pièce de résistance (spelling totally Googled) MF had pooed and so naturally I asked if he pooed and he said no. I asked again. He said no daddy. So I said "it smells like you pooed." to which he answered, while pointing, "go in kitchen now."
Seriously. He forgot the word to kitchen when I was his rickshaw but now when I'm being put in a time out in my own house he remembers?
Part two:
Well he became nice again after the roids wore off. And then is where the VapoDad was VapoKidded (hey Vapo folks please pay me for that VapoKid thing... Or hire my agency for the VapoKid work you're gonna want to do.)
On Thanksgiving I broke my toe. It was quite traumatic but what I remember was being at the park and seeing a bunch of wolves running towards some innocent children trying to attack them. I ran up to the alpha-wolf and kicked him in the jaw. The kick was so hard that I broke my toe and the wolf turned around whimpering.
I was cheered on for my heroic act then, because I'm a hero, I waited a day to go see the doctor for treatment.
Others may say that I was at the dog park and kicked a tennis ball but missed and hit a rock. They also may say that the toe isn't broken. Who are you going to believe?
So I was limping a bit and my toe was dark purple. MF kept asking what happend and of course I just replied that I had been a hero and hurt my toe.
Then when we headed to our Thanksgiving meal (the day after) I got off the elevator. MF asked what happened again so I told him the hero thing. Then I asked if he'd carry me.
And he held out his arms.
And Last:
Remember that Vaporub has this Facebook deally called Feel Better Friend where you can send virtual care packages to friends. You all may know that I'm not really a Facebook fan and I don't dig many apps, but I can honestly say, and I'm not just saying this because they are sponsoring this post, that it's kinda cool how they search your friend's statuses to see who may be sick.
Also two of my friends are sick right now. Also I'm not really friends with either.
Ok, so if you read the post that linked you here you'd know it's a sponsored post. The folks at Vick VapoRub wanted to hook up with me because they're launching their first Vapo Dad so they wanted to hook up with the best dads ever and best dad bloggers and of course I was at the top of the list...
Well the tubes helped quite a bit. He does still get sick but luckily we can now see goo flowing out of his ear before the infection gets bad. Can I say that "luckily we can see goo flowing out his ear"?
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| Noo Noos |
While it may sound disgusting that he mistook the inner ear for noodles it actually just shows that he's a genius that knows Italian because Orecchiette is one of his favorite noodle shapes and it means small ear in Italian.
Then the doc comes in, checks him out and gets him on the table to suck that goo out of his ear. By "his ear" I mean MF's, not the doctors... That would just be weird if he did that. Just wanted to clarify...
So the nurse holds MF's head and I get his body... Surprisingly he didn't just want to lay there on his own. Awkwardness ensues when I kiss his head and he moves and I come uber close to kissing the nurses hand and so apologize.
The suctions starts and Miloh says "done" which means done. He says it a bunch of times (and we console him) and then says "more done" and I laugh. It's probably obvious what "more done" means.
But he's never used "more" in that way... He'll see a dog and say "dog" then see another and say "more dog" blah blah blah. It usually means another but there was something funny about "more done."
After laughing at my screaming kid I had to explain to the doc and nurse why it was hilarious... They have no sense of humor.
Moving on I'll get to that Vapo Dad... It's being announced today that Drew Brees is the first ever Vapo Dad. Who is Drew Brees you ask? Actually I'm betting most of you know... I think I know who he is because I'm guessing the Quarterback of that Saints... I remember his name being thrown around a few years ago (maybe last year) when they won the Super Bowl. Not sure how much of that is true and if there were some type of engine that could search things I'd use it but alas there is none.
So Drew Brees being a footballer brings me to my office Fantasy Football league. I was asked to join and said that I knew nothing about football... Then I was told it was only $5... So I'm in.
And while I know nothing about the sport, except the very basics, I somehow was in first after the 5th week and second after the 6th... Not sure what's going on but somehow I have a good-ish team. Now I'm in third–yet have the most points... How can I be doing so good?
Although really by the time you read this I could totally tank because my numbers look bad this week.
And next week my quarter back Ben Roth(whatever)er goes up against Drew so let's hope Drew gets so super sick that no amount of VapoRub will help because he's projected to be about 7 points over Benny.
I know that's not really kid related but if I win I could take that $70 put it in a college fund for MF and with interest and such by the time he goes to college I could buy him lunch one day.
And that's what my sponsored posts will be like... Still me.
P.S. while I don't have to mention this I will... VapoRub has a Facebook deally for this campaign... It's called Feel Better Friend. It's to share how you or someone cheered someone up when they were sick... Not sure laughing at your kid is one of those things.
Shortly after Miloh was born the folks at Coocoi sent me a merino Babywrap swaddle for Miloh. I was psyched to get the opportunity to try it out because Miloh loves to be swaddled.
When I arrived I instantly put him in it. It took me a coupe tries to get the swaddle right because we were used to the Halo Sleep Sacks. The Coocoi works a bit more like the Miracle Blanket.
Once I got Miloh in he loved it...how do I know? He didn't squirm and he conked out.
Here's some of the key features:
- Merino wool so it's natural and renewable
- Super comfy...it has a little give but it still kept Miloh snug
- The merino has a natural stretch that keeps baby snug but also allows some freedom to move
- It's lightweight but keeps your baby warm...but not to warm
- It absorbs and wicks moisture which helps to regulate your bodies temp
- Low fire risk because wool has fire retardant qualities
- Their product photos are pretty cute
Another thing I like is that I was able to change his diaper easily without getting him unswaddled...I kind of swooped the bottom of the wrap to his back changed the diaper and swooped it back to the front. Then tucked everything back and he wasn't the wiser.
I highly recomend it...I'm not just saying that...we really like this swaddle and were bummed when it went missing for a couple weeks...it's back and in commision.
Check out their site for more info check out their site Baby Sleep Bags or check out their Amazon store
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A bit ago a reader of the blog asked me to do a round up of baby carriers for guys. I had planned on doing this much earlier by testing them out with weighted items but I figured the best test would be with an actual baby...so I waited.
I looked at 3 different carriers; the Moby Wrap
First up is the Moby Wrap
My thoughts...I'm a dude...not gonna wear it, okay I tried it on once but I would never leave the house with it. They make some styles for men with camo or screen prints but I can't ever see a situation where I would wear a wrap...unless I'm getting paid a lot of cash (please inquire about pricing.)
However I did try it on and here's what I found. It's thought to figure out how it works...I think it would take a good number of tries before you can put it on without instructions. It felt comfortable with Miloh in there and he felt secure. Staci had the Moby Wrap
on a couple of times and liked it.That's all good but I have to stick with the whole I'm a dude and will not be seen in a wrap (not that there's anything wrong with that.)
Pros: I felt Miloh was quite secure
Cons: I don't think many guys would use one (I'm sure I'll get comments to the contrary.) Really hard to figure out how to use.
Next is the Ergo Baby
It took a bit of time for me to get the Ergo Baby Carrier
dialed in. Once I did it felt comfortable...next step was to get Miloh in. It was easy to do.I did feel like Miloh was a bit less secure in this than the BabyBjorn (next review) because he's so small. Besides that the carrier with Miloh did feel comfortable to wear.
However I see that they offer an infant carrier and support cushion for super little ones. That's awesome and all but you're adding over $50 to your bill when you put both of those on. They say it helps you spend less because you only have to buy one carrier so that is something to think about.
Back to fit...what was nice is it's made like a back pack but for a baby...so there is some nice lower back support. This is great for Staci because she has a bad back.
One of the things that intrigues me most about the Ergo Baby is that it offers multiple carry positions. You can carry in the front, back or the side. I didn't see a minimum weight for the back carry position, but I know Miloh is too small especially because of the newborn floppy head deal. I will try a back carry position when he's older and post my thoughts.
All in all it's a nice carrier, familiar set up because it's like a back pack and it has a pocket on it. Takes a bit to dial in but I'm finding all carriers are like that. The biggest fail for me is that in order to make a super little dude feel snug you need to shell out some extra cash.
Pros: Has a little rain hood for baby. Nice back support. Multiple carry positions...I really like this and will revisit when Miloh can be on my back.
Cons: I don't feel Miloh was secure as it's sold without extra accessories.
Last is the BabyBjorn
They sent me the Original organic carrier
. I was a bit nervous about this one as Staci told me a friend had it and hated it...however we found out last weekend it was actually a carrier from a different company who shall go nameless, mostly because I forgot the name...turns out her friend loved the BabyBjorn she got to replace the other.Like the Ergo Baby this one took a little bit to dial in...I mention this for all of the carriers...I don't think it's a fault because good gear should take time to fit correctly but I always wish companies would have the default fit me perfectly.
Once it was fit right I put Miloh into it...it was super easy to get him in. Once he was in there it was very secure. The thing I really liked about this carrier is there is a floppy head strap (they call it a head support strap.) This allows you to tighten the head in for super tiny folk so their heads don't roll around...love this feature.
To be honest I have spent the most time with Miloh in this carrier...as a newborn I feel he's more secure in this one and it's really comfy. He likes being bounced in it. I actually had him in the carrier for the first half of me writing the review.
A big thing on my wish list for this organic version would be colors...their organic line is all one color (walnut - nice color though) but I wish there were more options. I really love the Orange
color carrier and wish it came in organic. Actually I kind of wish all companies made all their products organic.Pros: I felt Miloh was super secure. I love the head strap so his head doesn't go all floppy (that's a bit of a fear of mine.) Easy to get him into and he was comfy while in it.
Cons: One carry position. Color choice in organic. It took me a bit to get over the fact that it didn't fit like a back pack...it's more of an X thing across your shoulders...but I got used to it quick...that was more of an original prejudice on how these things work.
One last thing on BabyBjorn
Here are links to all their sites
BabyBjorn
Ergo Baby
Moby Wrap
Also BabyBjorn would like me to let you know to check out BabyBjorn Believers which is their community of fans...you can get more info about their stuff there.
And last...I finally wrote up a disclaimer for reviews where I get product. You can check it out here.
Last night I ran random.org to pick the winners. The first number to come up was 24 from Morgan so she wins a Safe Starter and a Safe Sippy2. The second number to come up was 5 which was from Jewel who will win the Safe Sippy2. Thanks to all who entered and congrats to Morgan and Jewel.
If you've been reading this blog for a while you may remember I did a post about the Safe Starter from Kid Basix. It's a stainless steel bottle with a silicon sleeve and is a great alternative to plastic bottles because it's sturdy and BPA free. Check out the original post for all the info.
Kid Basix actually has a full line of great products all of them stainless steel and BPA free. One of their newest products is the Safe Sippy2. We're giving away two of them (and a Safe Starter bottle) so read on about the Safe Sippy2 and then enter to win.
It's a great looking travel drink cup that has options to grow with your child. Like the Safe Starter this has a really clean design. It's made from lightweight food grade stainless steel and it's non-leaching and toxic free. The thermoplastic rubber sleeve makes it easy to grab and helps insulate cold drinks.
The handles are great because they are a perfect size for small hands. When your little one gets too big to use handles they are removable. The neck is tapered and has the rubber on it so smaller hands can grab on.
The spout is designed to be small because research by speech development experts suggest that the wider spouts of most sippy cups can lead to speech development problems. The smaller spout is better for developing mouths.
As I said earlier the Safe Sippy2 grows with your child. When he/she is too old for a sippy cup you can attach the straw which makes the bottle into a regular straw style travel bottle.
One of my favorite features is actually the most basic...it's dishwasher safe. I hate when I buy metal travel mugs that can't go in the dishwasher and don't understand why no one else is making things like this. I love that this can go in the dishwasher.
And last, the Safe Sippy2 also comes with a cap and a travel plus so it doesn't leak or get dirty when not in use.
You can find the Safe Sippy2 on Amazon, a bunch of local and national retailers or you can win one here.
Prize: There will be 2 winners. First place will win a Safe Starter Bottle and a Safe Sippy2. Second Place will win a Safe Sippy2.
How to enter:
There are 3 ways to enter...each involve leaving a separate comment, you can enter all 3 ways:
Method 1: Check out the Kid Basix site and leave a comment below telling me your favorite product or feature. Please include your email in the comment if you don't have an email connected to your Google Connect account. You can format it like: whoever -at- wherever - dot - com, or whatever way you want.
Method 2: Follow @BretPlate (the Kid Basix CEO) on Twitter and tweet about this contest. In the tweet add @smonkyou and a link to this contest. Then leave a comment below letting me know you tweeted and please add a link to the tweet. Please include your email in the comment if you don't have an email connected to your Google Connect account. You can format it like: whoever -at- wherever - dot - com, or whatever way you want.
Method 3: Become a fan of Kid Basix on Facebook and leave a comment sating you did. There are some nice videos and extra info on their page so check it out. Please include your email in the comment if you don't have an email connected to your Google Connect account. You can format it like: whoever -at- wherever - dot - com, or whatever way you want.
The contest will run 3 weeks and will end December 15th. I will announce the winners (picked via random.org) on this post. Good luck!
And for full disclosure I was given a Safe Sippy2 and a Safe Starter so I could do a hands on review this time. We tested the Sippy2, with the straw feature, on a friend's 2 year-old child and he loved it. It fit his hands really well. Then my cat decided to knock it off the table and it bounced twice and had no dents or dings. I honestly think it rocks.
After you leave a comment if you don't see your comment below please email me at smonk (at) smonkyou (dot) com and I will add your name in. Blogger seems to be having a problem with comments today, especially anonymous ones.
